Avatar’s Final Act Will Shock You!

James Cameron has begun production on the latest Avatar movies but the true final act may surprise you!

High art inspired high art

He’s thrilled you many years ago by repackaging Ferngully into a movie about smurfs! He has a history of success, with every single film he’s done has been a hit or a cult classic. Suspicious.

What happened to the other Avatar sequels?

Avatar is up to 4 now. Feel left out? No one has seen past the first one but James Cameron insists its good.

He keeps going on and on about this old news. Old men think 2009 wasn’t that long ago and nothing has changed. Especially old men with millions of dollars and a mountain of respect from gullible rubes who think he made the movie in his garage by himself.

Does he know what a gallon of milk and loaf of bread costs in 2022? Probably not. He has “people” for that. People he likely talks to like they’re trained police dogs.


James Cameron’s Final Act Revealed!

The final act however, is that James himself wants to go to the Avatar world and live there, permanently.

Think about it for a moment.

VR is big, they’re trying to shoehorn in this whole live in a virtual metaverse instead of living life idea. Cameron would love to be able to go out in public without people asking him to sign their Terminator 2 mug from the 1990s.

He wants to be uploaded into a world where mugs don’t exist.

He has the technology to do it now. He was waiting for all sorts of technology. The public facing narrative is that he was waiting for the underwater rendering to get better but we here at Mutant Bunker now know the real truth about Mr. Cameron.

Avatar 43 is in full swing!

When he said he was working on Avatar 43, he got the idea: why not just make an entire world! There will be trees! Blue people! COMPUTERS! IT’LL BE UNLIKE ANYTHING YOU’VE EVER SEEN! (That is unless you walked through the park before seeing The Blue Man group and checked your cell phone to see if the show started.)

The Avatar Has You, Neo

Avatar 43 as it’s code-named will be a replacement for reality.

Cameron himself will be the first occupant of Avatar 43. He envisions reaching full upload after Avatar 40 but he won’t reveal it until he populates the world in his own image.

Every one will be named James and you will live in the utopia village of Cameron, watching all of James Cameron’s movies all day long.

Someone will try to sneak in another movie from a different director and they’ll go missing. No one will speak of them anymore. Turns out that movie was Pulp Fiction.

“They’re no longer an avatar, deleted user.” James will say as he cackles madly with his voice modulated to sound extra evil.

Don’t worry it won’t stop there, more films to come!

Once we’re all uploaded we’ll be forced to be unwitting actors in his next movie Avatar 44.

My speculation: It’ll be an all out battle royale and it’ll most likely be a brand new Fortnite event where Travis Scott gets to personally kill your avatar and he doesn’t even have to have Astroworld going on to do it!

Nothing bad will ever happen in Camerontopia

Since James is perfect and nothing he makes ever goes wrong.

This will be a golden age of mankind, we will all be in harmony as we all applaud the scene in Terminator 2 where Arnold “My Grandpa was SS” Schwarzenegger takes the leather jacket from the biker’s playing pool. So naked, so cool, so funny. It impressed me when I was 12! That T-1000 is scary bro!

No one will watch Avatar or its many sequels in this virtual world because it’s too fucking boring.

When it likely plays, they will develop an out of body meditation technique that helps them remember Terminator 2 where the robot guy gives the thumbs up to his human son as he melts himself so the son can have his roboinheritence. James will think the smiles are for Avatar as he always does.

In conclusion, I’d say James Cameron is an out of touch bona-fide mad man and that was prior to the conspiracy theory I made up nursing myself back to health after McDonald’s gave me food poisoning for the 100th time (poison me 100 times, SHAME ON YOU!) Yes, if you want good reporting you have to eat like an adult baby with no discipline.

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Writer/Editor. Drinker of Soy. Eater of Soy. Lover of Soy. Don't judge.