Bill Maher wants the weather to know it’s on notice! Yes, this isn’t a joke to Bill. This is the real deal.
THE REAL DEAL WITH BILL MAHER
Bill Maher went on his show last night and told everyone that if any natural disasters happen over the next few days, they can blame the democrats. When the audience didn’t laugh he scoffed and lectured them with all of his white privilege using the powers of the patriarchy emanating from his ancient bones.
Of course he then made sure to make it very clear that his insults were directed towards the audience, the viewer at home and the general voting public who identifies as left.
The audience boos him and he further explains his simple jokes before leaving for the day and fucking off to his podcast basement dungeon called Club Random.
LATER THAT DAY…
On the way home he sees a cloud and starts yelling at it, “Sure, easy for you to be up there not voting for Hillary, fuck you.”
Bill then proceeds to drive home because he’s going to drink booze with Bob Costas in an uncomfortable podcast interview on Club Random.
Bob Costas’ electronic programming circuits malfunctions midinterview but Bill doesn’t notice. He drones on and on because he’s used to bloviating on to an audience of stone faced minions who nod and agree with every single thing he says without even thinking or taking into consideration the ramifications of what they are saying. Costas’ handler removes his robot body and takes him in for a tuning.
Bill pats himself on the back for another successful interview.
A JOB WELL DONE!
A cloud flies by the next day and Bill is outside yelling again about how there is no god and Trump will get elected. In the middle of his typical rant, a bald eagle swoops down and grabs Bill by his crotch and carries him away.
America is finally at peace. The partisanship ended when the bald eagles decided to sterilize every divisive pundit with their freedom beaks and their liberty talons. Freedom for everybody and equality for all, except Republicans of course. Bill would have wanted it that way if he didn’t jump into his spaceship and fly directly into the sun to finally get back at climate change deniers.